Sports, Boy Scouts, and Jesus... Can they chill together?

I have been doing youth work for about 13 years... and still trying to figure things out! But in all these youth groups there has been a common thread... when a youth start sports or any extracurricular activities church gets thrown in to the background.

I have seen youth love church and have seen them leave because sports trumped church. Or practices conflicted with opportunities for bible study and fellowship. It use to be Sunday was a sacred day in our society and practices would normally hold off on that day. But no day is sacred anymore. 

Recently I was talking to my very good friend Paul who is an amazing youth minister about this. And we both lamented students we lost because they had to choose between extracurricular events and church. 

So here is my two cents although not much.... 

1. Sports are great. I wrestled in high school and wasn't that good at it but it built character and leadership skills that I carry with me today. But I also made it a priority to be in fellowship with my Christian brothers and sisters. They coexisted and I always found an opportunity to do both. It is possible! 

What an important value to teach our youth that extracurricular activities and church can coexist. That they don't have to give up one for the other. 

2. I want to be a big fan of what God is doing in your youth's lives in their extracurricular activities. I can't do that if I never see them! I want to be at their events cheering them on and supporting them. I want them to know how proud I am. I want to do it because I know it matters.

The last youth group I served the mayor's daughter went to our church. And one Wednesday night he realized that there were a lot of people missing because they had Volley Ball practice scheduled for that night. He made it a point to contact the coach and to tell them that was unacceptable and they moved their practice time. He did this because he knew how much they valued their church and their sport. 

So I hope you come away hearing that sports and extracurricular events matter and are very good for our youth! And also that fellowship and community can be a foundation that compliments them well.

Musical chairs never gets old...

Spaghetti+New Editions+GUTS

First off yesterday I got to go eat some super good spaghetti provided by Jordan and Ian's boy scout troop. It was downright delicious plus I enjoyed getting to support the youth doing some good for their community through Boy Scouts! I am down for anytime that I can support our youth in our community. So please let me know of any sporting events, fundraisers where I can show up to support them!

These past three weeks we have looked at how God would have us to live in the midst of our families. I feel like the youth have made some good traction in how faith plays out in their family and the positive difference it can make.

This week we added a prayer wall (painted on chalkboard). The first comment from the youth about the newly painted prayer wall was that it needed to be bigger! There is something awesome in saying that. We have so many prayers... so we need a bigger prayer wall! Praying for someone whether it is our family or friends shows that we really care about them. We care about them so much that we are willing to pray for them. So we made the wall bigger. It has already filled up! Pictures are below. Grandparents, parents, families, on and on have made the wall. And we ended the night lifting our families and friends up to Jesus! God is working in these youth. I couldn't be more blessed to be apart of their journey.

The next three weeks are going to be awesome. Our three weeks series is simply called: GUTS. We will be exploring some of the fundamental questions of our faith. Here is how the three weeks will play out...
1. What does it mean to be a Christian?
2. What is the difference between following and believing?
3. Can God ever stop loving me?

This is going to be a good three weeks and your youth wouldn't want to miss it! Hope they can make it!

Do your CHORES!

Sometimes it might seem like each week that you might be on repeat...

1. Do your chores!

2. Do your homework! 

3. Clean up your room! 

4. Wake up!

5. Who are you texting on the phone I bought you?

To which some youth might respond... 

1. I will later....

2. I will when I want too...

3. Well, it is my room... 

4. Turn over and go back to sleep... 

5. None of your business! 

The reality behind the youth's responses is that they typically don't get them anywhere. And they just might feel that they have a sense of entitlement to what they call "space." But the truth is that parents that stay in our space and that push us make us better human beings. 

This past Sunday we talked about ways that we could change and be better sons and daughters. And that even in our middle school days we can take some responsibility that actually helps our parents. Because the typical youth responses as mentioned above does not get them anywhere. It actually adds fuel to the fire. 

Our theme verse for this year is from 1 Timothy 4:12, "Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but instead set the example for the believers in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity." And one of the challenges before the youth is setting the example in their families. 

My hope through this series is that youth will begin to understand ways they can become more prayerful, helpful, and responsible in their family. My hope is that they will be taking some action this week!

This week we will be talking about dealing with pain in our family by using the story of Joseph.

I thought for added kicks we will have a pic of the week to share from UMYF! Enjoy!

R-Rated okay for teens?

I can tell you to start off that there is no black and white answer to this question. And I sure don't have the answer. When a youth starts out a sentence with "have you seen..." I brace myself. They want to tell me about their favorite part of "you name the R-rated movie." And often times I try to creatively change the subject.

The reality is that parents of all shapes and sizes differ on this. There are a number factors at play. 
1. Peers- if a youth's peers have seen an R rated movie and they haven't...they feel out of the loop. So they want to see such and such movie so they can feel more a part. I get that because I have been there!
2. Youth think they are mature enough. They feel like they have reached a growth level to which they can "handle" the language, sexual content, and violence.
3. They will watch R rated movies anyway.
4. How much damage can two hours really do?

Given these realities it is easy to to give in and say open the door to movies with endless, inappropriate content. How much damage could it really do? They will eventually be old enough anyways.

There is a scripture 1 Corinthians 10:23 says,"  'All things are lawful,' But not all things are beneficial. 'All things are lawful," but not all things build up.' " As I have grown older I realize that we have created an imaginary line of adulthood and childhood. For me I can legally watch any movie I want. But I know that they are not all beneficial.

To me it is all about being informed. Because one can't completely shut off your youth from the world of violence, language, and sexual content. Even in popular sitcoms there is a slew of sexual content and language that is often times slyly inserted.

Communicating and researching the context of any movie is a smart plan and being able to tell your youth why it isn't appropriate whether they like it or not.  (and I need to ask myself the SAME questions... is this movie appropriate for me?) Is their anything beneficial in Saw 4?

Telling a youth "no" I realize is not a popular decision but to me it is what makes parents heroes. I remember in my tenth grade year of High School I was invited to a party at friend's house. This was my first high school party. I knew there would be drinking and I planned to drink. My mom (a high school teacher) had insider knowledge about this party and they told me I couldn't go (while some parents... just told their kids yes). I was angry at my parents for standing in the way. Now as I look back on that experience I am grateful. They stood in the way of a negative experience.

Sometimes youth won't understand now the importance of hearing "no" but I know they will some day.

Like I said this is not a black and white issue. And I am not a parent! But I have spent quite a lot of time around a variety of youth.

Would you be willing to reply to this post and tell us the rules in your house? I think the wisdom of parents can be incredibly helpful!

Click for an article from both teens and parents.
Click here for an article on one Christian's view on R Rated movies